Young Adult

Over the weekend, I watched "Young Adult" starring Charlize Theron. While it wasn't the best movie I've ever seen, it was a fearless character study. Charlize Theron plays a highly unlikeable woman, Mavis, who is obviously (in my non-professional opinion) mentally ill.  Once the most beautiful and popular girl in her high school, she is now 37, but still mentally stuck in high school. Her character is incredibly self-absorbed, and selfish. Just like a child to never think about anyone but themselves.

Her apartment is disgusting, and for some reason, this woman has a dog. A dog that she never takes for walks, never gives water to, and that she locks in her hotel room alone for most of the movie. Her TV is always on reality TV, mostly "Keeping Up With The Kardashians". Her appetite for TV that a 16 year old would watch is just another facet of her mental immaturity. She is consistently drinking throughout the movie, so it appears she has an alcohol abuse problem as well. I think, as we all probably know, alcohol is going to exacerbate every problem she currently has. She gets an email one day that her former high-school boyfriend has just had a baby with his wife, and that is her wake-up call. It's like the thought suddenly dawned on her that her ex was not sitting home alone, and crying because he doesn't have her anymore. In her mind, she is so beautiful that everyone wants her. Just like a high schooler to think something so naive. And just like a high schooler to think that beauty is the only thing that matters, and that beauty would make a married man leave his wife.

She gets in her car, and drives to the town she grew up in, intent on whisking her ex away with her to big-city life. It never even crosses her mind that this man is married, happy, committed, content. He will obviously jump at the chance to be with her again, and leave his wife. Sigh. There is a lot more that happens in the movie, but what I'm walking away fascinated with is her character. Her character is the author of a young adult book series, which is fitting for her. Because she is likely forever 16 in her mind, she writes in a high school voice.

Her newest book, about a beautiful popular girl, is how Mavis thinks about herself. She changes the names of her characters, but the book is her thoughts. She talks about how her character, Kendall, is envied by everyone and how she is better than everyone. This is exactly how Mavis feels about herself. At the end of the movie, when she is rejected by the happily married man, in order to make peace with her mind, she kills off the love interest in her book. This is how she deals with the fact that she was rejected. Just kills him off. Because, of course, it wasn't her. It was him. It's so interesting that she couldn't have a breakup in her book, she had to completely kill him off in order to go on with her life. Nothing else, but death could explain why her character Kendall is not united with her love interest. It also shows how closely Mavis's real life is entwined with her novel life.

I think what drew me to this character is how similar she is to fantasy-me. I've always been drawn to writing, and I regularly write stories in my head. While I'm getting ready in the morning, I'm imagining a story in my head. When I'm cooking dinner, I'm writing another story. Cleaning the house? Lost in my imaginary world. And my fantasy-me is so beautiful that everyone immediately falls in love with her. Exes pine and never get over me. They think I'm the one that got away, and they would take me back in a second. This is a part of me that never manifests itself in my real life. In real life, I'm shy, awkward, and I wouldn't ever think that every single man I see wants me. In my head, my ex would leave his wife and family for me. In real life, I know this person is happily married and would never leave them in a million years.

I was just so drawn to this character. In Mavis, I saw a part of me that only exists in my head. In my head, I'm extremely narcissistic. I just don't care. I walk around saying whatever I want, to whoever I want. But to be a narcissist, I'm pretty sure you have to lack empathy, and empathy is not something I lack. I'm very happy that this part of me doesn't manifest, because let me tell you, it wasn't pretty to watch in a movie. Her delusional behavior was just that. Delusional.